When you are sharing space with someone that already knows how their story will end you learn a little bit about what it means to prepare to die.  This preparation takes many forms and awkwardly stands beside the mundaneness of just living the moment that you have today.  As you might imagine there are letters to be written and meaningful gifts to be bought that will have their place with the people that get to go on living. My friend is dying. Her preparation, not unlike her, has been unique and beautiful….she got tattoos. This was not one of those throw caution to the wind decisions to live out an unrealized dream of her youth. Oh no, it was so much deeper than that.  For the people in her life that have loved her and touched her in ways that know no depth, she picked tattoos to represent each of them.  These tattoos are beautifully displayed on her right arm, one of the only parts of her body where she felt as if she still owned the rights to her own bodily real estate. One of the only places where she could look and see what she was before the cancer unpacked it’s bags and moved in. She graciously gave up this space for all of us that love her.

I remember her telling me about the tattoo that she would get for me.  It was that of a dragonfly.  I didn’t understand why she picked this symbol. We had never spoken of dragonflies. I had never expressed an interest in them. Yet this was her choice. She shared the meaning with me as we sat at a table eating a simple meal in a simple place. In hindsight, it was the perfect backdrop. There was nothing to distract me from this moment and with perfect clarity I saw myself through her eyes.

The dragon fly has many meanings….”symbolizes change, self realization, and the understanding of the deeper meaning of life”. In that same moment, I saw myself in a way I hadn’t looked at myself in quite some time and I was reminded that I had let my life get so cluttered that I had stopped allowing myself the time to be still, to really think, to really consider and to write.

With this reminder in my head, I carried on about the business of living my congested life. I had changed nothing. A few months after she shared the gift of the dragonfly with me, I was letting myself into my room at a hotel where I was staying. Just outside my room, there was a picture of a dragonfly. I stared and stared at it. I believe in fate, things don’t just happen by chance. Here was the Universe giving me a gentle nudge. I took out my phone and snapped a picture of the dragonfly. It’s been 8 months since I took that picture, and with the start of this blog, I finally figured out what it means. There I am reflected in the image of that dragonfly. THERE. I. AM.

http://www.dragonfly-site.com/meaning-symbolize.html